Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

 ... you can learn from:

Totally F***ed Up (1993)

Steven: Shit, it's hot!

Andy: Greenhouse effect. Acid rain, nuclear dumping,

no ozone left, the whole planet's a goner.
I give it another five years max.

A very happy birthday to the icon James Duval today!

Five Frames From ?

What movie is this?

Good Morning, World

Why are there like ten famous guys who look exactly like this right now? Not that I mind. I like this look. But I couldn't tell you which is which. Well except that I happen to know that this one here is Jack Innanen from the T.V. series Adults and I've really started to think I should watch Adults. The little bits I've seen around have made it seem very funny and good god could I use funny right now. So I ask y'all -- do you watch Adults? Is Adults funny?

Hope in 200 Words or Less

Kind of astonishing that a movie that careens towards three hours is able to keep you hyperventilating on the edge of your seat for quite as long as Na Hong-jin's South Korean blockbuster does, but Hope is a rare breed -- a pile of pedal-to-the-metal monster-mayhem that obliterates any questions or doubts you might have before they can properly form in your head. Is there some extremely dodgy CG? Oh hell yes. Does it never let up long enough to let you know who any of its characters are? Oh double hell yes. I just complained about the same stuff in Adam Wingard's Onslaught a few days ago and yet somehow Hope, at three times the length of that film, is three times the movie even with the same deficits dangling about -- it's just that unlike Onslaught, which revels in showing us things we've seen before Xeroxed to lifelessness, Hope is constantly showing us things we've never seen before. Not this way. It's kind of like the opening scene of Bong Joon-ho's The Host meets Mad Max: Fury Road -- it's a breathless monster of a movie that will blow your hair right back.

Quote of the Day

"It’s so standardized that AI can step in because there’s not real storytelling,... It’s mimicry of something that has happened before. And I welcome AI to replace all the idiots who are into nothing but repeating, repeating, repeating until it’s ad nauseam. When it’s ad nauseam, please, please, please let AI step in and do the job.”

We've seen so many exceptional talents, from Paul Schrader to Darren Aronofsky to Steven Soderbergh (ugh), expose their shittiness to embrace A.I. slop -- so when I first saw the words "Herzog" and "A.I." in the same title I winced for a moment, expecting horror. But no per usual Herzog's The Man. Thank goodness. Read about it here.

Dom Daddy Andy

The race for Best Actor at the Oscars this year seems super stacked, even to this here Oscar-agnostic -- everybody from Matt Damon for The Odyssey (please no)  to John Malkovich in Wild Horse Nine to Robert Pattinson in Primetime to Jack O'Connell in Ink and on and on. But the most interesting one to me (sight unseen still, mind you) is Andrew Scott in Elsinore, which just premiered at Venice and made Oprah cry in the street -- one because dear Andrew should have fucking won for All of Us Strangers and he wasn't even nominated. (Who, me bitter?) But two: as long as I've been writing this site I've been wondering who might be the first out gay to win an acting Oscar -- when I started it was really just Ian McKellen out there, but then there was Ben Whishaw (who I nicknamed "Our Great Gay Hope") and now we've got even more options including Andrew Scott yes but Colman Domingo seems possible these days as well. Or somebody could come speeding out of nowhere, of course -- there are enough out people acting these days to make that a possibility too! Golly things've changed. Anyway...

Gay Rights is getting to create your own TV series where Andrew Scott spits in your mouth

— Jason Adams (@jamnpp.bsky.social) September 8, 2026 at 12:58 PM

... I'm not really here because of all that. Oscar talk was just the "respectable" chatter I could exploit befor segueing into our real reason for being here, which is the super sliutty clip that's been making the rounds of Andrew Scott in the upcoming series It Gets Worse. (More about the show here.) What, I'm not going to post this filth? My god. If Andrew can win an Oscar the same year he speaks the sentence "You're just a hole for Daddy" on-screen that would be more than I ever could've imagined being possible way back when! 

Five Frames From ?

What movie is this?

Good Morning, World

I will always take your bait, Karl Glusman.

 

Welcome To Hell

On the one hand I was feeling a little OTT bonkers there before lunch what with a great big pile of awesome things I absolutely had to post all at once dropping on my face -- three important movie trailers and a sexy new photoshoot of Josh O'Connor? Yes please. But on the other hand it's good I gifted y'all with a heap o' content that quick-like because I gots to go. I've got a early screening today. Actually this is probably the right moment to admit that it's basically lift-off for the Fall Movie Season right off the bat post-Labor-Day as I've got early screenings nearly every night this week and then next week NYFF press screenings begin and it gets really crazy. I'll only be online the first two days of next week! Movies movies and more movies -- I hope my fragile brain can keep up. (Editor's note from the future: Reader, it did not.) Anyway I'll be here most of this week save a few early disappearing acts -- you'll surely be sick of me by then. But will you be sick of that photo of Michael Fassbender? Yeah I thought so.

One other note of, uhh, note -- I once again spent most of the long weekend tearing apart my bookshelves and listing things on the ol' eBay for purchase, so please please please go check it out and help me get it all out of my house! Make offers -- I accept (reasonable) offers! I knew I was about to get really insanely busy, so I managed to get this shit done beforehand for a change -- for once I was on it. Probably because I really need the money right now??? Yeahhh my credit card debt has finally caught up to me -- I'm working on sorting that out but if anybody has any advice my ears are wide open. Or buy some stuff on eBay! Or donate money directly to your needy distracted and wholly self-destructive host via one of the links in the right-hand column. Or just send me a cartoon bomb in the mail to get it over with. Really, I'm open to all ideas!

My madness continues -- I have added SO MUCH to eBay for sale over this long weekend. LOTS of film and art books. Have at it (pleeeeease) www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_...

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— Jason Adams (@jamnpp.bsky.social) September 7, 2026 at 5:21 PM

And Then There Was Jake!

Okay now it's getting ridiculous -- did all of the PR people get together and conspire to make me a harried ball of overwhelm today? First it was Godzilla Minus Zero, then it was Artificial, and now in the span of an hour a third trailer aimed straight at my interests has dropped -- the teaser for M. Night Shyamalan's Remain starring one Jake Gyllenhaal! This is an inexplicable collab between Night and the writer Nicholas Sparks of all people so I have no idea what to expect... well except what this teaser tells us anyway, which a lot. Including...

... Jake apparently being shirtless for half of it?? 

But this movie isn't out until February so it's the furthest away and, given how much I'm already dealing with pshycologically and emotionally, I'm just setting this one on the back-burner for now. Watch:

Sam Altman's Twink Terrorist Compound

It's barely 11am the morning after a long holiday weekend and I am already spiralling into chaos -- they're throwing too much at me this morning! Literally seconds after I posted the longer trailer for NYFF World Premiere Godzilla: Minus One my inbox lit up with the teaser trailer for NYFF World Premiere Artificial from Luca Guadagnino! And it's everything I needed it to be, this teaser -- Gay Villain Sam Altman's Twink Terrorist Compound is all I needed to see. Luca has made the movie he needed to make. Now feed it to me! (Also I don't think I knew that Damon Albarn had done the music and to this Ravenous-score-fanatic that's got me extra tingly!)

Artificial opens in theaters on Christmas.
This and Werwulf! What a day!

Minus Zero = Everything

I am seeing Godzilla Minus Zero in just eighteen -- EIGHTEEN -- days when it World Premieres at the New York Film Festival and as if I wasn't already wetting myself they went and unloaded a longer trailer for the film than we'd seen previously (click here to see the first teaser) and I AM SO EXCITED. There is a moment mid-trailer when the aspect ratio changes that straight up had me levitating out of my office chair. No new sightings of NYC in this trailer (we saw the Statue of Liberty in the teaser) but they do let on that Godzilla has a foe showing up -- who do you think it will be? You can't really say that the first film in this series was necessarily "realistic" like Nolan did with his Batman movies but it was more realistic than they usually are, so I'm curious which of Godzilla's foes fit into that framework. Which is to say I would be very surprised to see twin lounge-singer sprites serenading a gigantic moth just yet. But who knows! Director Takashi Yamazaki no doubt has the freedom at this point to do whatever the hell he wants to. Let's hope that works out like it did last time!

Godzilla Minus Zero is in U.S. theaters November 6th.

OH MY GOD WHEN THE ASPECT RATIO BLEW OUT I ORGASMED www.youtube.com/watch?v=kw0Y...

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— Jason Adams (@jamnpp.bsky.social) September 8, 2026 at 10:47 AM

Drew Starkey in Our Sights

Per usual I liked last week when I said I'd update my last post before the long weekend with a link to my review of Onslaught -- one I got fully settled into my puddle of laziness there just weren't no shaking it off. But this is a net good for you because now you get to stare at that sexy bonus photo of Drew Starkey while I play catch-up -- win win and winnnn. Click here to read my thoughts on Onslaught, which are... mixed, to put it mildly. I even went to see it a second time to see if my expectations had been to high the first time, to see if I might be able to enjoy it more on its own terms as a dumb thing, and nope -- it was even less fun on a second watch. (Except for Drew, who I think walks away with the movie -- yes even more than Dan Stevens doing his own weirdo thing.) Shrug. A shame.

Five Frames From ?

What movie is this?

Josh O'Connor Fourteen Times

Since Steven Spielberg's Disclosure Day didn't leave that much of a mark on this year (I liked it myself) I had to go and check to see if Josh had something else coming out this fall to "justify" his landing a big sexy photoshoot for Another Magazine here at the nascent tip of Awards Season -- Josh does not have anything else coming out this year, and that makes me happy. Not that he doesn't have anything coming out -- that Another Magazine was just like, "We can do a big sexy photoshoot with Josh O'Connor? YES LET'S."

It's what the people want any time of any year no matter the situation, so good on them for getting that. Anyway I haven't read the interview yet but it does involve an upcoming project for Mr. O'Con -- he is chatting with on Saoirse Ronan about Three Incestuous Sisters, their film reuniting Josh with his La Chimera director Alice Rohrwacher. The other two "Sisters" of the title are played by Dakota Johnson and Jessie Buckley and yes this should be your most aniticipated movie of 2027, duh. 

Looking at the cast list just now -- Mick Jagger is in it too?? When was the last time Mick Jagger was in a movie? The last one I can remember off the top of my head is Bent. Dude doesn't act very much -- unless he's been off starring on ten seasons of an NCIS show I've never heard of. That happens sometimes. Can you imagine? Anyway -- Josh! Josh is why we're here (hashtag evergreen), and these photos specifically, which have him looking very attractive indeed. Hit the jump for 'em...

Good Morning, World

How did y'all spend your long weekend? if your answer is "staring this photo of Charlie Cox and shrieking about it on social media over and over again" then you might be me. And that'd be weird! Anyway I'm sure I've posted hotter pictures here on MNPP in our 20 plus year history but I am having trouble thinking of one right now -- Charlie went and broke me, my brain, my everything, this holiday weekend. So good work, my man, cuz my brain needed breaking honestly. But doesn't it seem like he should Charlie doing some sexy roles right now that are taking advantage of this physical peak tremndousness though? One shirtless (and waxed, the criminality) scene per Daredevil season is not cutting it. Get this man in an erotic thriller stat. Preferably a very gay one. I know you've got it in ya, Chuck. And speaking of having things in you (heh), here I am. Back. Yippee. Let's get the new week to going, then. Hope everyone had a nice long weekend! I hope you were hot and smiling like Charlie here; that is what I wish for you.  

Dan Stevens Gives Labor (Day)

Remember how everybody yelled "David Caruso! David Caruso!" at Dan Stevens when he ditched Downton Abbey after its third season to try and become a movie star? Well joke's on those psychopaths  -- I mean who yells "David Caruso!" out like that? Positively unseemly! -- because little Danny-boy's aquitted himself quite nicely, ekeing out a surprising little niche among today's most interesting weirdo character actors. I sure didn't see it coming since I hated him on Downton and was happy when Matthew Crawley's car veered off that damn road! Sorry not sorry, Lady Mary. But then he got hot for The Guest and all ill will was forgotten. Yes I am that easy. You know I am that easy. We all know I am that easy! But speaking of The Guest, Dan has gone and reunited with that film's director Adam Wingard for this weekend's fresh release Onslaught -- and I am reviewing it! But nnnnnnot jusssst yet. Consider this post a place-holder until the review goes up at Pajiba in the next couple days. I'm seeing the movie a second time tonight -- with Mr. Stevens in attendance, even! -- so this post will be updated once my review is live. For now I'm just saying my (semi) goodbye for the long weekend -- we'll be closed up til Tuesday. Everybody have a good Labor Day weekend -- make it even better by donating to (or joining!) a local union. Fuck the billionaire pigs! Bye!

Fra Fee Four Times

Big thanks to photographer Charles Moriarty for sharing these gorgeous photos of out actor Fra Fee on his Instagram earlier today -- click 'em to embiggen! They're giving me Walt Whitman via James Bidgood feels. What's the word? Bucolic. That's the word. Anyway on Tuesday we shared the trailer for director Zack Snyder's movie The Last Photograph which co-stars Fra in its lead opposite an extremely buff and oft-naked Stuart Martin. You might recognize Fra from previous turns on the Hawkeye series or from the Rebel Moon movies or from all his hot sexy times with Leo Woodall on Prime Target. Or maybe just from the several times I've posted about him now. I do sometimes tend to get fixated!

Thursday's Ways Not To Die

Scanner Cop (1994)

Kind of can't believe it took me until this week to watch one of the Scanner Cop movies, given I'm such a big fan of the original Scanners film (aka anything David Cronenberg ever touched) -- I suppose its status as a property only nominally related  to his classic 1981 film (it's set in the same world but nobody involved with the original had shit to do with this) was enough for me to shrug it off and you know what? I wasn't wrong to -- it's fairly awful. But it does have a few moments so ridiculous in their badness...

LOL I forgot the drug in Scanners is called "Ephemerol" David Cronenberg really is the greatest to ever do it

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— Jason Adams (@jamnpp.bsky.social) September 1, 2026 at 8:42 PM

... that it's not an entirely fetid experience, and the one up top really made me howl. The story is that ordinary people are being brainwashed to kill cops, and in this moment a cop's wife for some reasons is made to envision a gigantic devil cockroach when her husband playfully shows off his badge. I don't know but the devil cockroach got me. Also her chopping of a head of lettuce made me think about the head of lettuce scene in 1988's Slugs and anything that makes me think of Slugs is worthwhile. Viva Slugs! But not so viva Scanner Cop. If any of you have seen any of the other sequels tell me if there's any reason to watch anything else. Otherwise I'm probably bailing while I'm, uhh, behind. Until I get the urge to watch a bad movie again anyway. So... tomorrow? Probably tomorrow. Hit the jump for links to all of the previous Ways Not To Die....