Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

 ... you can learn from:

City of the Living Dead (1980)

Blonde gravedigger: Will you check her out? 

Talk about a "box lunch". 

Gravedigger: I'm telling you, you'll end up a dirty old man 

reading that stuff. A pervert. A peeping tom. I saw this 

porno flick once. This guy in the audience got so carried away 

with it, he humped himself to death. 

Blonde gravedigger: Yeah, but what a way to go.

Just a heads-up to all of my Fulci Freaks out there that today marks the 99th anniversary of the great gore-maestro's birth! That means you've only got one year to create your centennial maggot-masks and wood-shard-eye-sockets and cow-intestine-tongues with which to celebrate! Get to goring! Okay actually now that I think about it, maybe starting a year early with half of that stuff is a bad idea -- it will start to stink real fast. Especially the intestines thing. Check out your refridgeration situation first I guess. Anyway yes here's to 99 years of Fulci -- I love several of his movies a lot but I do think City of the Living Dead will probably always be my favorite, and that discussion above, bringing Shakespeare into the age of Italian sleaze, is a good reprsentative moment why. To be or not to be, to jerk off to death or not to jerk off to death -- ehh what's the difference? What a king. 

Couple Quick Capsules

As I've said about thirty three thousand times this week I've been busy writing reviews of films I saw at the Tribeca Film Festival, which ended on Sunday, and that's why it's been a wee bit quiet in here. A couple of those will be dropping this afternoon (I think) but I do want to take a moment anyway to jot down some very fast off-the-cuff thoughts about a pair of new-ish horror movies that I watched on my own (i.e. not for the fest) in the past couple of days. Because they both ruled and I should say so!

Mārama (dir. Taratoa Stappard) -- It's not often you see an entire new sub-genre of horror film present itself these days, but if we could get about one hundred more "Gothic Maori" horror movies in the coming years I wouldn't side-eye askance at that. I'd be in heaven after this here unexpected meeting of flavors burst in my mouth in the most incredible of ways.  Ariana Osborne (who often seems a dead ringer for Lily-Rose Depp in Nosferatu) plays "Mary", a Maori girl who finds herself shipped off to not-so-jolly-ol Victorian England by a colonialist dickhead (Toby Stephens) whose got a fetish for her people (enslaving them, mostly) and wants to have Mary teach his own daughter about their ways. What Mary is faced with in quick succession is a bunch of upper-crust British assholes play-acting racist tropes -- thankfully she's got some will of her own and is no wilting Bronte gal, but damn this movie slaps. Visually and thematically a feast. Stappard is clearly one to watch.

Is God Is (dir.  Aleshea Harris) -- A tale of blistering revenge that will probably, and purposefully, make you think of Quentin Tarantino (tcasting Vivica A. Fox as the mother being avenged will do that), but writer-director Aleshea Harris along with her two incredible lead performers Mallori Johnson and Kara Young (as twin sisters Anaia and Racine) hand in something all their own here. A lot of Southern Gothic, dripping with moss and heat, with a real fire burning in its belly -- its heroines, who sink into the moral morass of their parentage no matter how hard they fight against it, are to my eye immediate movie icons, like nobody you've ever seen on-screen before and completely impossible to look away from. Oh and Sterling K. Brown should only play villains from now on. Anyway this is completely spellbinding stuff -- I absolutely cannot wait to see what Harris drops next. 

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Oh and as an aside I just realized that both of these incredible movies are debut features and holy shit does that make me optimistic for our movie future. Hey, websites and entertainment magazines, how about some cover-stories that talk about the British-Maori man and the black woman who just dropped two of this year's truly great horror films, instead of just slobbering obvious praise all over the two straight white YouTube dudes who made the most financially successful yet nevertheless mediocre ones? Just a thought! Puttin' it out there!

Five Frames From ?

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Good Morning, World

Austin Nichols seems happy to see us this morning.

A Kit Grows in Brooklyn

There have been so many photos of Kit Harington looking blisteringly hot on the Brooklyn set of his upcoming Hulu limited series Count My Lies that I've stopped keeping track of them because -- Depressing! Why aren't I there??? However these new tank-topped photos today have broken past my willful ignorance at light speed and so here we are, suffering for his art once again. Lord whoever almighty just transport me to this place! Even if I end up half-stuck in the pavement when I rematerialize there it will have been worth it for a single glimpse of this in person. Anyway in related news it was just announced (via, thx Max) that François Arnaud will also be co-starring in this series, so we can possibly look forward to seeing Kit and François being photographed together, as well as my immediate and one hundred percent related to this death. ETA I dug up a few more photos so do hit the jump for them...

Pics of the Day

Another day now where the Tribeca fest has officially ended yet I'm busy pounding out reviews from it that you're not seeing just yet -- just know I'm doing the work! And you'll see fruit from it soon enough. Anyway here's a good quick thing to share -- a pair of new photos of the boys from my beloved Leviticus, writer-director Adrian Chiarella's new queer horror classic (says me) that's out on Friday. (thx Mac) Yes this very Friday of this very week! I hope you are excited -- you should be excited. Here is my review from a couple of weeks back when it screened at NewFest. Check Neon's website to see if it's opening near you -- they tend to be helpful with getting that knowledge out there and this one's getting a surprisingly robust theatrical count for its opening weekend. Pessimist that I am I won't pretend I don't think its box office will pale in comparison to much-lesser movies like Backrooms and Obsession -- it's emphatically a film about queerness, as opposed to you know men hating women or pirates. But I love that Neon is pushing the movie so hard -- give them your money! This movie's so worth it.

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Good Morning, Gratuitous Hayden Michael Brown

Last night when I saw Tom Holland's sexy leggy cover for the new issue of Esquire UK I'd figured he'd be getting this morning's "Good Morning" post but you know what? From a glance at the rest of the photos that dropped on the magazine's Insta this morning it seems like the only hot-shot is the cover and then everything inside the magazine is milquetoast and I'm tired of Tom baiting us. So no "Good Morning" post for you, Tom! Instead I'm going with a dude with one acting credit to his name and it was on that Ryan Murphy show starring Kim LastNameIDoNotType. Cuz that's how I roll.

His name is Hayden Michael Brown and that show was called All's Fair and I never watched a single second of it -- even though (save Kim) it had a cast of extremely talented and charismatic actors including Naomi Watts, Niecy Nash, Teyana Taylor, Sarah Paulson and Glenn fuckin' Close, among many others, it got some of the most horrendous reviews I've seen in some time. But I doubt that was hottie Hayden here's fault -- he was only in two episodes and...

...  I can't imagine he wasn't hired to mainly showcase how hot he is. And boy looks hot! And yes of course he does since he's mainly a model, which explains how I managed to gather up dozens upon dozens of photos of him even though his only acting credit is two episodes of a deeply despised Ryan Murphy show. Maybe at this point you're wondering how the hell I stumbled upon Hayden all of a sudden this week without having seen his Very Important Two Episode Arc on All's Fair then? A fair question! Twas those dastardly chaps at Behind the Blinds magazine...

... who were behind it again, featuring this young fellow in one of their latest photoshoots. They always got my number over there at Behind the Blonds excuse me Blinds. (That was a real genuine typo but clearly I'm keeping it.)  Anyway -- take notes, Tom Holland! This is how you get ahead in this business. Spider-who? Ody-what? Exactly. Hayden who and what and I'll tell him "where" when he gets here. Hit the jump for dozens more of Hollywood's new everything...

Two Secret Lovers, Wagner & Me

Although Kleber Mendonça Filho's The Secret Agent was one of my favorite movies out of last year it's not the September 2026 Criterion release that got announced today that I am the most thrilled about, for one simple reason -- we already knew that Criterion was releasing this film on disc. That news had been spoiled months ago. But I don't think it takes a brain surgeon to figure out why I'm nevertheless beginning this post with that picture of The Secret Agent's leading man Wagner Moura. I think we all got it! I am a simple man. Anyway this will release be on 4K, it comes out on September 22nd, and this movie is probably pretty much an undistputed masterpiece -- if you haven't seen it yet do, and then just buy the damned disc. Or blind-buy it. I really doubt you'll be unhappy you did. It's one of those rich feasts of movie that we hardly ever get anymore. Moving on to more feasts...

... the September release that has not just knocked my socks off but shot them right across the room is the box-set of three Leos Carax movies! Fuck yeah and yes please! If we were just talking about his first film, Boy Meets Girl, which I only just saw for the first time a couple of years ago and fell deeply madly and completely in love with upon first sight, that'd be enough here. But it also includes his two Binoche!-starring follow-ups, Mauvais Sang and The Lovers on the Bridge -- amongst Juli's best roles, which is really saying something when you're talking about the world's greatest living actress says me. These two are magnificent showcases for her and for what magic Carax is possible of making. He's one of my number one movie-makers, and this set will give you a clue why. (I wish Criterion would go ahead and put Holy Motors in the Collection already but I'm sure it is inevitable.) 

And then we've got another two-fer of 2025 flicks coming in hot -- there's Richard Linklater's Nouvelle Vague, which as far as Richard Linklater movies go I kinda of liked? Out of the two movies he made last year it's a goddamned masterpiece at least, compared to the unbearably shrill Blue Moon which I couldn't fucking stand. I thought all of the actors were terrific as the French New Wave Gods they were tasked with playing in Nouvelle Vague at least, and Linklater's adoration of characters who won't shut the fuck up for five seconds at least made sense when dealing with a person like Jean-Luc Godard. The other 2026 title is Sergei Loznitsa's "Kafka-esque thriller" Two Prosecutors, which I really wanted to see (I will watch anything described as a "Kafka-esque thriller") but somehow slipped through the cracks. I will consider this release my chance to fill up said crack, then. Any fans? Is it indeed a "Kafka-esque thriller" or is this just Criterion suckering in Lit-major dopes like me who always fall for that descripotion? 

I'm gonna plow through the last three titles coming out in September a little quickly now because 1) I don't have a lot to say about any of these and 2) I should be working on my ongoing Tribeca reviews but I am allowing myself a brief break so the site doesn't sit here silent as the grave all day. Here goes. They are upgrading Sidney Lumet's classic 12 Angry Men to 4K; they are dropping the massive nine-hour-long Holocaust document Shoah (which means that I will definitely finally watch Shoah, one of the long overdue experiences I've admittedly been terrified of experiencing all these many many years); and they are releasing Satyajit Ray's beloved 1970 film Days and Nights in the Forest, which I have not yet seen either. Ray also represents a massive hole in my film knowledge -- I believe I've only ever seen Pather Panchali? So many damn holes and cracks to fill, damn damn damn. 

Five Frames From ?

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Good Morning, World

What did I tell you guys last week when that photoshoot of Charles Melton dropped for GQ? I told you, and I quote, that "I would not be lying if I told you that 2026 Me wakes up every single morning hoping for a new Charles Melton photoshoot to appear." Well I woke up this morning hoping for it again, and voila -- it happened again! Alright alright I had a wee bit of warning on this one because W Magazine teased this photoshoot last night with a little Instagram video (one which I have natch made gifs from) but nevertheless. Beef awards season has finally gotten me to care about awards season y'all. What a miracle. Anyway happy Monday and hit the jump for the rest...

Oscar Isaac Has Murdered Me

Hello Mister Police! Solve my murder! This photo of Oscar Isaac on the set of Julian Schnabel's In the Hand of Dante has finally and officially done me in. Goodbye, cruel world. At least til Monday.

Beam Me Up, Joshie

How nice to watch in real time a truly talented and handsome young man like Josh O'Connor go from bum-fucking in the mud to starring in an outer space alien epic by the one and only Steven Spielberg. It's been a true pleasure. I know some people knew who he was before God's Own Country but there's when I hopped on the Joshie train, and it's been nothing but choo-choo-choosing him ever since. I'm not a betting man but I do see the appeal of choo-choo-choosing a winner dammit. Anyway I have gone and reviewed said "space alien epic" Disclosure Day today, so click on over to Pajiba to read that -- it's a very weird movie, not really a "space alien epic" at all. But I found it thoughtful and surprisingly moving, especially in the ways it's having a conversation not just with Spielberg's stamp on cinema but with our current lived reality. I mean it's got lots of action scenes too, and nobody does 'em like Spielberg, but it's really... well I'll let you discover for yourself. Just give it a chance, says me. It's a surprise in a lot of ways. 

Morgan Specter Seven (Plus) Times

May our preeminent Rail Daddy himself Mr. Morgan Spector never stop being so generous to us -- for Cultured magazine today he's gone and gifted his world of fans and admirers, but mostly me personally, yet another half-naked photoshoot,. And we, I, thank him, from the depths of our...

... well you know, depths. And yes I will take this moment to plug his new movie Caity which just premiered at Tribeca -- I doubt I'm going to review it but he gives a lovely little performance in it, you should seek it out when the time comes. And with that said, let's get back to the main event, these pictures. Hit the jump for the rest... 

Pics of the Day

This is so, so weird, you guys. I was just literally just thinking this very morning that if Paul Mescal is gonna be off shooting Sam Mendes' four Beatles bio-pics for all of the foreseeable furuture the least he could do was go for one of his patented shirtless short-shorted jogs to satiate those of us who need a fix... when suddenly, wham, as if the internet read my brain (can... it do that now?), photos from the now-shooting films arrived that showcase Paul and Barry Keoghan filming in Spain on a boat in short shorts the both of them. WTF?!? I really am magic, you guys. You don't want to ever lose me! I make short-shorts happen! Hit the jump for several more (and hopefully Harris Dickinson and Joseph Quinn will be joining the short-shorts club shortly)...

Had a Man Smoke Ya Pole

I don't think there's a right or a wrong answer on whether William Friedkin's 1980 film Cruising was ultimately a "good" or "bad" thing for the gay community -- I think the people on the scene at the time were right to protest it and I think the younger people like myself who are extremely grateful to have this window into the pre-AIDS leather world of NYC are right as well. It's complicated! And thankfully Jeffrey Schwartz's new documentary Mineshaft: The Cruising Murders, which just premiered at Tribeca, treats it as such -- click here to read my review. At an extremely tight 84 minutes my only complaint is the movie could've been longer, but I think it does a great job introducing the dozens of perspectives that surround the film, from then and now. Good stuff, perfect for Pride Month! (Although no I do not yet have any idea when it will be out in theaters so don't ask me!)

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